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But at least it means Iapos;m still alive.

Ever get that feeling like...things are happening at you,and not to you?

Well thats me as of late.

This whole SEM thing.

College Apps.

Boys/Men. Or the lack of them.

This friggin sinus infection that has me ready to remove them with a buttter knife using my prescription cough syrup for anesthesia.

Gah.When did things start being so...complicated?I canapos;t think of any particular point.Its anybodyapos;s guess.

Maybe its when Dad started staying out all night.

Or when Grandad died.

Perhaps freshman year.

Bah.

Ive been trying to be resourceful here at home.

Filling out applications.

Writing papers that arent due for a while.

Ive found that..I really donapos;t have much to say...not in the way that college admissions people expect it. Ive started,at least 7 apps.But then I get to the essay part and spazz.

I have no clue what they want from me.

I have so many personalities.

So many ideas,hopes and dreams.

How can I honestly and convincingly put them in a little box using 500 words or less?

I refuse to not get into my top colleges just because I canapos;t write an essay or two.

Im an excellent writer

So,what happens now?

Where am I going to?

Perhaps I shouldnapos;t ask anymore......

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